Tag Archives: submissive

REBLOG – What do you want ?

I came across this wonderful post written by Sir Symon. When I read his about Page I smiled. We seem to have a lot in common like age, origin and we have both English mom’s too. I would not be surprised finding out we are the same kind of Dominant.
If you are a Dom or Master I would like to recommend Symon’s blog as it is really worth your time to visit thoroughly.

Symon’s writing touched me as it is not only something I could have written, albeit not so eloquently. With Princess I have an intense, caring and loving D/s relationship. So it reads as a very familiar story too.

It is a very respectful and affectionate article about how a Dom should encourage and motivate his submissive. There is a lot of responsibility and maturity involved in being a Dom (or Master). It is about understanding her, about respecting her and meeting her needs and not to abuse her in any way.
Sir Symon is right when he states it is not about sex but about love. The sex is only the cherry on an already intense and delicious pie.

Enjoy reading.

What do you want?

If you are truly going to own and dominate a woman, you must understand her. Everyone, of course, is unique, but I’ve seen some of the same things over and over between the submissive women I have known:

They are motivated by a deep desire to please. When you ask a “vanilla” woman what to do, she will often reply “whatever you want”, which seems at first sight “annoying”. However, you must understand that phrase for what it is from a submissive. She wants more than anything to please you. Whatever plans or ideas she had on her schedule, if she can make you happy she will be more fulfilled than doing whatever she wanted to do for herself. You must understand that phrase for what it is.

Now, this can easily become abuse. Many submissive women have been through a number of abusive relationships. They give and men take and take and it becomes abusive. Weak men with self-esteem issues are often drawn to these women, which compounds the problem. It takes enormous strength and experience to take from a woman like this (which is what she needs) without abusing her. Your job is to soak up all her love and affection and attention, help her find ways to please you, while supporting and strengthening her as a person. This takes wisdom, experience, and, I believe, some age. I cannot imagine a 20 years old man being a successful “Dom” in any real sense of the word. At this age, I wasn’t really a kind and wise Dom.

Continue reading HERE

REBLOG – Do You Really Need To Train Your Submissive ?

My friend Vile wrote an inspiring post and it is a little different from his other posts.

I totally agree with Vile when it comes to my own D/s relationship with Princess. There was no training involved and the D/s dynamics installed itself in a very natural way. At that time we already enjoyed at its fullest the pleasures of BDSM. Princess and I knew what we needed out of a relation and gradually the D/s grew. Yet I can imagine that newbies to D/s or very young people will find it more difficult to establish this kind of relational dynamics without training or whatever one wants to call it.

Do You Really Need To Train Your Submissive ?

The truth is , no you do not. I know this sounds weird coming from me, but in a real perfect world no training is really required.

Many of you who are in active relationships have really had no type of formal training. Having no training can be okay and find if you are in the right hands.

Now you ask me how is having no training possible and being in a D’s relationship even possible ? How can a D’s relationship work with no training at all?

To train someone is to change someone into something the Dominant wants or needs. Training can be mild to extreme. Training can be very loving, or it can be very hard and strict. That would mainly depend on the Dominant or Master.

If you are truly a Submissive and you have the need to serve, in the right hands no formal training is really required.

Here is my thoughts and my reasoning. You have a lion who gives birth to a cub, once the cub is old enough to learn how to hunt it already has the basic instincts. What the cub now needs it for the lion to teach it how to use the skills it has already.

Continue reading HERE


REBLOG – Men vs Masters

I found this article to be very to the point, true and well written. You can read more great articles on the blog Jade and him.

On her blog the author is quite clear. No part of her blog can be copied or published. The reblog-buttons work but I have experienced problems with that, the point to my WordPress-blog and not to the SirFrancoBolli blog.

Of course I do respect her wishes.
Please read her article Men vs Master by following this LINK.

REBLOG – Are You A Submissive Push Over ? You Have Rights You Know #BDSM

Reblogged from an article my friend Vile posted on his excellent blog The Kinky World Of Vile. By reblogging I agree with what Vile, an advocate against abuse, writes.


You know it seems many who are new to the lifestyle are really gullible, because you believe anything your told, and without asking questions you just follow knowing something is not right.

I have talked about this before, when your first meeting a new Dominant or maybe a Daddy Dom.

You have to ask questions, and you have to know what questions to ask. Going into a relationship you already have some knowledge about what your role in the lifestyle you would like to take part in.
You have been reading, or maybe you have talked to others, so you have an idea what your role would be. You cannot let someone tell you what they think your role is.

Your a Slave, and you can be convinced you are, your a baby girl and you can be giving a few reasons and you will believe it. Only you truly knows who you are.

You also have to ask questions when you first meet, but there is a little known trick called Dominance through intimidation and most fall for it every time.

You will call me Sir, there will be no eye contact. You will wear a skirt with no panties.
You know coming from a Dominant those are really pretty stupid request, and have very little to do with D’s. None of the above have anything to do with submission when your first meeting someone.

One you have both agreed to enter a relationship, the no eye contact thing can be used as a training tool, but the subject of training is a whole new story..

Continue reading

Looking back on our play date #BDSM #EroticRomance #Dominance #submission

We had a wonderful evening, Princess and I.

When she arrived I ordered Princess to go to our bedroom and change. Her sexy Fetish Wet Look dress was lying on the bed. Princes is not allowed to wear anything else but what I have prepared so of course she was naked under the dress.
“Bring what I’ve put next to the dress with you when you are ready and please knock before entering our living room,” I told her.
Minutes later I Princess gently knocked on the door and when I opened it she was standing there smiling, happy as a lark.

The sexy dress fitted as a glove and in her cupped hands Princess held her collar.

After she answered the three questions that have become some kind of ritual I collared her and I led her to the church chair.
Before I gave her permission to sit down I touched her, lifting her dress so I could inspect what’s mine. Her pussy was already wet and I told Princess she was under no circumstances allowed to cum.

The she sat down and I opened the bottle of Shiraz using the wine set Princess had given me.

We drank and talked for a while in our dimly lit living room and she told me she enjoyed hearing our BDSM play music again.

I got up and helped Princess stand up and directed her to the red cushion that was waiting.
“Kneel,” I commanded.
She kneeled and I could see the burning desire in her eyes when I dropped my pants.

“Pleasure me, girl,” I growled.

After a while I grabbed Princess’ hair and helped her up and then pushed her over the backrest of the sofa and lifted up her dress.

I did not waste my time warming up her butt and spanked her with the rubber oven glove. Princess was making all the right noises so I knew she was enjoying every blow and soon her breathing changed. She was on the verge of climaxing.

I stopped the spanking and quickly pulled a rubber over my rock hard cock. I spread her buttocks and gently pushed against her sweet little rosebud.

It did not take that much of an effort and within seconds I had her ass speared.

First I move leisurely, brushing her shoulders with the rubber whip. Then I put it aside and grabbed Princess’ hair pulling her head backwards, holding her hip with my other and fucked her mercilessly.

Princess screamed and told me a zillion times how much she loved me.

I pulled back seconds before she climaxed and used a tissue to remove the rubber.
“Straighten yourself girl. Pull your dress down for heaven’s sake,” I snapped.

“Yes Milord,” she whispered.

Princess left for the bathroom and when she came back I was sitting on the sofa, drinking wine.
I pointed to the cushion l had positioned between my legs.
“You know what to do”, I added.
Princess kneeled again, unzipped me, got my cock out and pleasured me. She is indeed a very good girl.

“Enough. Get up and bend over the couch.”

She got up and did what I had asked.

“Lift your dress, girl.”
Seconds later I pushed my cock deep in her longing pussy. It was already soaking wet.

I went on till I felt how her pussy started convulsing around my cock and pulled back.
Princess sighed. The poor thing is not used not being allowed to come.

“Go and clean yourself up, girl. You look like you’ve been fucked silly.”

Sitting in the sofa I allowed Princess to crawl up against me and for a while I held her in my arms. She felt safe, wanted and comfy and we kissed and I stroked her gently and kissed her some more. Princess told me she liked the new dimension I had given to our playing and being used a huge turn on.

“Are you tired?” I asked.
“Yes I am, Milord.”
“I’ll take you to bed, girl,” I said attaching the leash to her collar.
She sank on all for and crawled to our bedroom and up the bed.

“Wait for me.”

In the living room I blew out most of the candles and a few I brought to the bedroom. After choosing a playlist on my iPod and making sure the music was not to loud I came to bed.

“Undress girl.”
We kissed and I ordered her down and she sucked and licked and then I pulled her up again and pushed Princess on her back and fucked her.
“No,” I barked when she asked permission to come.

I lay down on my back and Princess straddled me.

Soon she was fucking me and after a short moment I could tell she was close to a very intense orgasm.
“Come. Now, girl,” I ordered.
I felt a warm gush running over my belly, balls and between my thighs.

I cannot describe the noises she made but it ended with a long exhale of barely understandable words before she sank down on me, muttering and out of breath. Princess thanked me a thousand times and I could tell it had been a very intense orgasm.

Princess kissed me and I held her shivering body close to mine.

A little later Princess drank me and it did not take long after that before we dozed off.

A 5:30 a text message woke us up.
This time it was not Stella but Bo asking her mother if she would pick her up at 10:30 at a friend’s place. Bo was waiting at Barcelona Airport for her flight back home.

I could not help it but I made a nasty remark about us being woken up so early. Something about lacking respect for others and thinking their mom should be ready 24/24 7 and drop everything else at their command.

If it had been Stella I would no have minded. But that is because I have a meaningful connection with Princess’ first born.
Fuck, why texting at 5:30 and not when arriving at Charleroi Airport a few hours later. There would still be time enough for Princess to pick Bo up.

We got up at 8 this Sunday morning and made love. A delicious quickie it was.

Then we drove to Stella’s.
She had to work and we would be babysitting.

It turned out differently.
Stella complained about a painful shoulder restricting her movements and did not want to go to work.
Washing dishes or maneuvering a cleaning machine is heavy work and I can imagine with a wry neck it is even harder.In our presence Stella phoned to call in sick and her boss did not like it a bit. On a Sunday morning she has to find somebody else or do the work herself.

The discussion went sour and suddenly Stella hung up on her boss. Stella was raving mad.
Princess calmed her daughter down and we told Stella it was important to call her boss back and apologize.
Finally she did and even that call went a little sour.

There has been no single month since Stella started working that she hasn’t been absent one or more days. Mostly it is a last-minute call too. Her boss is fed up with this behavior.

On moments like this Stella’s limitations sadly become so painfully obvious.

At ten Princess dropped me of at my place and then she had to pick up Bo.

I am a little grumpy because our Saturday evening/Sunday morning was 3 hours shorter than usual.

Later this afternoon Little A. will be here and stay at my place for the next two weeks.


REBLOG – 10 Reasons Why You Suck As A Dominant #BDSM #Dominance #submission #ASMSG

Reblogged from The Kinky World of Vile, an excellent blog I follow.

There have only been a few times I have reblogged or posted others writings and when I did it was because I found it useful or very interesting. A very good friend shared this on one of her friends profiles on fetlife. She felt is was important enough for others to see, and after reading she was right. While I do agree with most there are some areas I do not agree with but it is still very good. It really does hit home……….

This was written by a Dom on Fetlife


This writing is intended for Male Dominants and female submissives. My writing is not limited to this audience but understand it’s intended audience.

#10: You don’t understand the basic concept of behavior modification/ behavior association

Explanation: I can’t tell you how many times I have heard “dominants” say something along the lines of “if my submissive crosses a line then she get’s 10 lashings when she gets home”. The reason this is a problem is because you are associating the lashings as a negative. You are engraving in your submissives head that if she crosses a line she will get beat and that is a problem if your submissive is a masochist… yet you wonder why she keeps exhibiting certain behaviors you don’t like? Because she might enjoy getting beat knucklehead!!

Resolution: Educate yourself on the power of behavior association and behavior modification. A fantastic book is titled Behavior Modification Basic Principles by David L. Lee. Check it out.

#9: You think you should allow or you allow your anger to fuel your Dominance

Explanation: There was a a point in my D/s life that I noticed I “corrected” my submissive better when I was angry/irritated.. yeah that is not cool.

Read the rest of the article via this link : The Kinky World Of Vile 

Toot-Toot Blog Tour Coming Through

My friend Vile has invited me to join his “Blog Tour,” which I accept with great appreciation and pleasure. So thank you, Vile.
I am a big fan of his blog The Kinky World of Vile and if you don’t know it then check it out.

What is the idea behind this Blog Tour?
It’s pretty simple. Answer the 4 questions about yourself and post the answers on your blog page and then invite a few other bloggers that you admire to join in on the fun and include links to their blogs on your page.

What am I working on at the moment?
Princess and I are shooting BDSM inspired photographs. It is an ongoing project we work on when we feel like doing so. It is private stuff or images for my blog.
A few weeks ago I started my Thursday’s Photograph project. The idea behind this project is to be creative “on command”.
I would love to write short stories, I have even a few plot lines ready. The only thing holding me back is my limited notion of the English language.

How does my work differ from others of its genre?
I have no idea if it does differ and if so in what way. I know my writing is mostly very personal. It is a very private, honest and, I hope, inspiring diary I am sharing with the world.

Why do I write what I do?
I enjoy reading about the lifestyle we, Princess and I, share. It helps me grow, helps me better understand the underlying dynamics and how they work together. Writing about the lifestyle forces me to think even deeper over what we do, how we experience and live it. It helps me grow even more as a partner and a Dominant. I also like to ventilate how beneficial this BDSM relationship is for Princess and me. Writing also helps me canalize my thoughts.

How does my writing process work?
I spend about 2 hours a day driving to and from work. Most of my ideas are born during these moments of relative solitude. For some reason there are ideas that rapidly become more viable than others. Then I start processing this newborn, narrating it in my head, moulding it until it is a story or a post.  I cross-out, reshape and modify my text in my mind. This part can take an hour or a few days.
When I finally write it down my text is almost in its definitive shape.
Sitting in front of my computer with an empty document to start with does not work for me. I find it, for example, very difficult writing a reply to a post on the fly.

 Here are 4 bloggers I love reading and would like to invite on this tour.

Stella Kiink

Love Hate Sex Cake – Musings of a libidinous life

Little Kaninchen

My life as a Sexually Submissive Woman

2014-04-29 09.31.35

Princess, a Collar and BDSM

A small part of this post was inspired by my friend Vile and his post “Should A Submissive Be Allowed To Wear A Collar” and the replies and a link to two beautiful posts, here and here,  by Little Bopeep and Mynx’s Sir.

I replied too, kind of half-hearted I admit, knowing I was going to write something on this topic.
After all this is a diary.
It is Princess and my diary.

BDSM carries a vast and varied cargo of flavors and a different experience for each of us. For Princess and me D/s is mostly a sexual orientation.

I do not own Princess except for what she has given me. Princess has given me her heart, her trust, her Love and her body.
When I think about it I have never been as close with someone as with Princess.

I respect Princess and I love and trust her beyond reason. Looking at her, seeing that postcoital glare on her face can make me cry.

It is as fucking simple as that.

Our relation is thus a D/s based one.
No Daddy/Baby Girl or Master/slave dynamics although I’m pretty sure Princess will tell you, when I am out of ear sight, she sees herself as my sex slave.
Do I or would we wish a 24/7 D/s relationship? That is an interesting question and for the moment the answer would be a full hearted NO.


I’ve cooked on several occasions for Princess and, when she was with us, for Little A. I’ve served them too as it pleasures me to do so.
A few weeks ago Princess cooked for the first time for us both. She asked for her collar and told me not to enter the kitchen. I sat at my computer and wrote and watched my love being busy in this space new to her.
It made me so happy. Not for the stereotypical role-play but because it felt comfy and familiar.

Princess served me an excellent chili con carne and told me she loves preparing dinner and serving me.
One could see this as an act of D/s yet I think it is simply common practice in most relations.

Helping Princess out with her agenda or assisting her choosing a GPS makes me a good and helpful partner. Listening to her and comforting Princess does not mean I am her Dom. I am simply her partner. We are supposed to help support and motivate each other. That is what relations are about.
I guess almost every D/s relation, to the outside world, looks like any other relation.
The differences lie much deeper and are less tangible for the public.

So for Princess and I D/s is a just an extra albeit intense layer on a normal and close relationship.

We use whips, clamps, bondage rope and hot wax among other things during our love play. Princess crawls for me or eats out of a bowl at my command. I decorate her beautiful body with bite marks and give her crimson red butt cheeks.
The combination of pain and pleasure brings Princess to mind-blowing orgasms.

All the above and the fact we trust each other completely and communicate the way we do, makes our relations better and more intense.
That I do believe.

I also believe a collar can be important in a D/s relation yet its meaning or importance differs depending of the type of D/s.

Princess did not earn her collar and we did not hold a collaring ceremony.

When we play I collar Princess, a symbol of her submission. It helps her shift her mindset too.

At my place she likes to sleep wearing her collar.

Princess always wears her collar when we play outdoors; at parties or at the Fetish Café.
She wants everybody to know she is owned and a submissive. It makes her proud, feel safe and under the protection of me, her Dom.

Has a collar changed or added something valuable to our relation?
Not really.
BDSM has though and in so many ways added to the depth, intensity and beauty of what Princess and I live.

Princess Collar

About a collar

A little more than a year ago I collared Princess after of course talking about it first. The only thing I now regret is I just put it on her without any ceremonial proceedings.

Princess had mixed feelings about it though. She found the whole idea rather silly. Using a necklace like one does for pets as a symbol for a D/s relation was beyond her imagination and Princess was sure she would not be able to take it serious but see it rather as a mockery.

I on the other hand did not want to get her a mainstream collar like a dime a dozen to be found on the Internet. Unfortunately I am not that handy so making one was not an option either.

One day I went to a pet shop and bought a very finely crafted collar and leash to match made of dark brown and very soft leather, expensive and of a delicate beauty. When I saw it in the store I knew it had written my name all over it. A perfect match it would be for a sexy and beautiful creature like Princess.

Princess liked it because it was handmade and smelled like leather should but her preconceived opinion and revulsion made it difficult for me those first weeks or so to even suggest putting on the collar. So it took some time for Princess to fully accept the collar for what it meant, a symbol of unconditional respect, trust and love mainly but also a token of her gift of submissiveness when we play.

Now she enjoys the moment when I collar her and it immediately brings her in the right mindset.
Lately Princess has mentioned she felt slightly down when I took off her collar after playing. She describes it as a feeling of desolation and I guess it is a mild form of subdrop that occurs after our sometimes very intense playing.
This is one of the reasons I only admit playing on evenings Princess can stay over for the night so I can be sure she is all right.  It helps sleeping very closely in each other’s arms.

Yesterday evening, after our Salsa dance course, we played and it was, like it always is, very intense. One of the highlights was a very passionate flagellation after I had warmed up Princess’ skin with a flogger.

I whipped the love of my love for about 15′ taking no prisoners and making her butt crimson red, working her shoulders too. These latter are one of Princess’ erotic spots and it makes her wince and moan whenever touched in a way I only know how.

The whipping made Princess cum as she always does, uncontrolled and abundantly and I just love the sound of her wetness splashing on the stone tiles of my floor.
I took her in my arms, preventing her from falling on her knees and I held, soothed and comforted her.

Then I took her to our bed and covered her and told Princess I would be back in a few minutes.
I blew out the candles and quickly mopped the floor in our living. Filled our glasses with white wine, made sure her iPhone was on her pedestal cupboard and slid naked under the duvet.

Princess and I cuddled and kissed and I grew hard and then I fucked her silly and she thanked me for every orgasm I gave her. She is a good girl although now and then I still have to remind her of the thanking part.

It must have been way past midnight when I decided to call it a day and ordered Princess to catch some sleep.  I hadn’t cum yet though. Between you and me, dear Reader, I don’t give a damn about cumming myself.  Pleasuring Princess, watching her while she climaxes and knowing I have the absolute power to do the things I do with her are by all means much more fun and pleasurable than me just squirting sperm in or on her.

My pleasure lays way beyond my desire. I orgasm mentally and intellectually each and every time Princess does and it is much more intense than the lame contractions in my lower abdomen and balls.
I made Princess change the soaked sheets covering the mattress after I had flipped it over.

Blew out the candles in our bedroom and kissed the love of my life goodnight. She didn’t say a thing nor complained and soon we feel asleep.

It was the very first time Princess wore here collar while sleeping.
Like I said, she is a good girl.

Princess' collar & leach

A simple love poem by Princess

No rules this night.
Our given names
You are Milord.
I am Princess.
I belong to You.
Only You.

My body and soul
Need to meld,
With Yours
In this hypnotizing game
Of Love.

I want to come
So close
To You, Milord.
So I can look
In Your heart,
That is my haven.

Take me with You,
To the darkest
Backstreets of Your
Lead me.
Trust me.

Love me.

You make me
Feel safe,
Loved and wanted.
You make me

It’s breathtaking
When You
Mix all this.
Such a tasty cocktail
Of lust.
Make me drunk
With lust and wantonness.
Make me want more.
And more.
Help me grow.

I feel You in each
Fiber, molecule and
Atom of my body.
An intense and
Very extreme sensation.
Flooded I am
My senses exploding.
It is maddening.

And then Milord,
You simply take me
To an even more
Unfathomable dimension.

Only You and I exist.
We drift on clouds of
Sheer ecstasy.
Drunken of desire
Lust and pain.
Thus I want to undergo
For eons to come.

Comfort me, Milord.
I am so afraid
Without You.

Take care of me, Milord
And guide me.
I have lost the way back.
Love me, Milord,
Life has no meaning
Without You.

I am Yours.
Only Yours.