Tag Archives: sm

Thoughts – November 23, 2017

 Past Monday they replaced the boiler in my apartment. The constant chilliness, candles, a small heater, and hardly any warm water were over.
Tuesday we played, Princess and I.
The room was warm and cozy.
A few candles lit.
Rope, pain, hot candle wax and pleasure.
Princess had a ball.
So did I.
We did not make love that night. Instead I held Princess in my arms while we waited in the darkness for sleep to creep in.
The next morning we made love. Showered with hot water. We drank coffee and went to the woods for a walk.
Way to soon it was late and almost noon.
We kissed and then Princess stepped into her other life.


Thoughts – November 2, 2017

It has been quite a while since my last post. Not much did happen. Princess and I went out to the club a few times. We’ve also been playing a lot at home.

I have the feeling we are moving more and more to s&m play. Rope of course. Tight binding as it creates quite some emotions for Princess. Helplessness but also coziness.
A blindfold.
Always a blindfold.

The tying done with domination. It helps pushing Princess in a mindset I want to plant on.
Utter submission.
Adding a slight touch of fear for what is coming.
Mindfucking is such a powerful tool.

Lately I have been using the cane almost exclusively. Just letting the tip trail over her body makes Princess shiver with delight and fear.
That is a very fruitful mixture.
So caning is an interesting opener for an intense play evening.
Wooden clothespins are always a success. Princess’s sides, her groin or the sensitive skin an inch or so below her belly button.
Holding a vibrator against the tips of these clothespins make them dance. It makes them hurt as hell and the mere idea makes me hard.

But mostly I use candle wax. I have a collection of candles with a low or medium melting point.
Belly, thighs, sides are very painful but on Princesses’ back it gives a more soothing effect.

The mindfucking, the caning, the clothespins, and the hot wax all work together to bring Princess into deep subspace. In between I might push Princess a few times to the brink of an orgasm.
When the scene ends Princess is floating. Closed eyes, a smile. I cover her naked body with a fleece and hold her. Give Princess something to drink.

These are moments we are so close it feels like we are two hearts, two souls in one body.

Image found on Pinterest. Source unknown

Meeting Sid

Past Saturday we went to our favorite club. It had been a while since our last visit. The club feels like a second home. We talked with friends. In the dungeon I tied Princess to bondage horse for some harsh impact play. It gave her an intense orgasm and shot her deep into subspace.

It was also a very exciting evening because we were going to meet a candidate.

When I placed the ad a few weeks ago my idea was to meet and look for a mutual connection. Princess was not concerned because she would wear a blindfold when we would play with. It would increase Princesses’ sensation of being used. Besides, finding a connection between two is difficult already let alone with three.

Sid was one of the men who reacted to the add. His reply was respectful and his profile interesting. He is a newcomer to our lifestyle. Sid had also put the results from bdsmtest.org on his profile. Albeit I take such results with a grain of salt it is useful. Sid scored pretty high on the non-submissive stuff indicating he is a Dominant.

Being a regular visitor of PDN he asked if we could meet there, have a few drinks, see if there was a vibe and take it from there.

This meant Princess was going to meet him too. We talked about it and she liked the idea. Being presented like that, checked out visually felt also very much as being used she told me.

So we met Sid.
I liked taking with him. It felt like we knew each other already. I told him what his role would be. He told me his expectations. He is respectful and that I like. Princess felt okay too.
Then Sid asked Princess if she liked sucking cock, being eaten, fucked hard and long. She smiled and say as much as possible on everything.
Hell that was hot. This man asking Princess how she wanted to be fucked by him.

She smiled. He smiled.
Then, with some hesitation, he asked Princess if she liked anal. She smiled again and assured Sid she loved being fucked that way.

Oh god, I had the impression my cock was going to burst out of my pants.

A handful of kinksters had taken seats around us and it was clear they were enjoying what Princess described as an interview. It pushed all her buttons and I am pretty sure she felt very slutty.

On our way home Princess and I talked about Sid and she was okay with the idea of him having sex with her. I had still some reservations though. His Dominant side but mostly because he smokes.

In bed we talked about it some more and it made me mad with desire and I fucked Princess hard.
We slept well and the next morning I mounted her while she was still half asleep.

The sex was great and Princess came and orgasmed and squirted over and over. We ended up with soaked bed linen.

Somewhere between two fucks Princess told me she fantasized about being gangbanged. Sucking off a bunch of men was another of her fantasies. Just fantasies mind you. Well, for the time being anyway.

Then Princess mounted me. Rode me while she licked my nipples. In my mind’s eye I saw her being used by 4, 5 men and the idea drove me mad with desire for Princess.

I screamed when I shot my seed deep in Princess.
It was a very intense orgasm.

This morning I messaged Sid and proposed a few evenings next week. I told him I have a very hot BDSM-scene in mind.

Thoughts – August 2, 2017

It was only somewhere in the beginning of June Princess was well enough again to play. It had been a rough 6, 7 months for her. A physical therapist did some good stuff. But starting a fitness program changed everything for Princess. Princess is building a harness of muscles around her hypermobile (hip)joints.

Past Friday, July 28, Princess and I went paddling in The Netherlands. On the Veerse Meer. Lake Veere is a huge lagoon in the province of Zeeland. In 1961 the Delta Works dam system partially cut it off from the North Sea. The Delta works were an answer to the 1953 flood killing 1836 in The Netherlands.

Princess and I kayaked some 4 hours and had a great time. Princess loves the fact I am now documenting our life on video.

Even if we can play hard again we can’t really. Little A., my 17-year old daughter, spends quite some time at my place. These past 2 weeks she has been continuously with me so Princess and I don’t have the quality time we used to have.

Yesterday she left for her mom and in a few days Little A. will be on a 10-day holiday in Croatia. I am really looking forward to have some very private time with Princess.

So we played, Princess and I and it was intense. I started with a good barehanded spanking. Moved to floggers and a cane. Tied her down. Used the fuck stick and the 13,500 rpm wand to pleasure her while tormenting her body with hot candle wax and clothes pins.

There was more like dirty talking, fucking and then some.

This morning we fucked again, over and over and over. Slept, woke up little before noon. The good old days of D/s and SM are finally coming back. I can’t speak for Princess but hell did I miss the playing, the SM, and the D/s. Like mad I did.

Whip’s End

More often than not, when Princess arrives at my place, I can sense if she is wound up or stressed. The latter find its origin in a combination of daily shit. Work and/or her kids and/or Stella are the most likely blends.

Yesterday was one of those moments.
When Princess entered the living room I grabbed and kissed her but it felt strange, as if a part of her tongue or mouth was not fully cooperating.
A part of her jaw was still numb after visiting the dentist. He is good yet Princess and I suspect deep down there is a sadist hiding in him.

I sensed the love of my life was feeling very tensed so I ordered her to strip.

Gently I warmed up her skin with a soft suede flogger. It is not only about warming up but more about putting Princess in the right mindset.

After a short while I asked her to take the bamboo pole that hangs from the ceiling. It is 6 feet wide and she grabs the ends. Due to Princesses shoulder problems I can’t tie her wrist and pull her arms up.

I touched her body with my fairly new 5.2 feel long faux-leather whip. It wrapped around her body, its end slapping her. She likes it on her back, buttock, breasts, hell, everywhere. Of course I adapt the intensity of the strokes depending on what I am aiming at.

This whip leaves marks as the skin becomes red and a little swollen. The intensity depends on the body part but on her hips, breasts, tummy and thighs they stay for a day or two.

That frightens me because I am afraid her kids will see them. They already, in the past, suspected I was abusing their mother.

On the other hand, Princess and I love these marks. It are love bites.

I did not overdo but I used my whip long enough to find out Princess likes it the most when she faces me.

Using a whip (5,25 feet) gives a whole new sensation. I love the swirl my arm makes above my hand. There lies beauty in the movement, in the intention of that movement. To stroke, to hurt.
I love the whooshing sound and the dry clap when her soft skin is touched by my whip’s end.

But I chose not to overdo it.

“On your knees Princess,” I then said.
I molded her body so her arms were stretched forward, her forehead on the ground, her back arched and her ass high.

Warmed my Princess up again with the suede flogger before ordering her to lie flat on her stomach.

I sat next to her, positioning myself until I found the right angle. For 20 minutes I used my cane.
Not in a continuous avalanche of blows but more every 45’ seconds or even longer.
I finished off the session with a harsh spanking, my hand waving over her thighs and then hitting her delicious ass. Over and over and over.

“Thank you, Milord,” she screamed when an orgasm, as strong as a monstrous tsunami, turned her upside down and made her mind and body spin.

Princess can orgasm on a spanking/whipping alone, without any sensual touching whatever.

As always it was an orgasm with some squirting. I held Princess in my arms for a while and then cleaned up the mess.

Some Dom’s let their sub do the cleaning job but I consider Princesses’ orgasms a gift so I do not have a problem with the scrubbing after.
Also I clean the toys because that way I can check them for fissures or other problems.

I held her close to me in bed while we watched some old Upper Floor clips.
We kissed, it still felt a little awkward.

The Princess said something that took my breath away and made me so very happy. I know Princess is open for what could happen on the road we have taken recently.
Until now though she had not said it yet. Not that it makes a difference but maybe it does. It felt like it was important though, hearing Princess say it.

“I am looking forward to my first threesome with you, Milord. The mere idea makes me so very hot.”
I smiled, there was no answer needed.

Princess and I know we are bound by desire and our love is fathomless.

Whip's End
Whip’s End



Full Suspension

“What I would love to achieve is to master as much of the technics as possible in order to be creative without the need of thinking about the tying itself. I want to concentrate on my interaction with Princess.”

I wrote the above a few days ago in an email. I’ve been corresponding with X. for some time now. Gradually we connected and I am pretty sure he now knows what I want from him.

The ties themselves can be learned from a book.

How one ties, the caveats and shortcuts, advantages and disadvantages of the materials used, can only be learned from someone who knows what it is about, has experience and knows how to teach. What is tight? What is snug? In a book these words have no real meaning, they have to be faced, shown, discussed.

We are getting there, X. and I and I am sure spending time with him will help me find the road I am seeking.

There is nothing wrong playing with a bunch of different toys. Erotic asphyxiation, pain, submission, impact play, electro play, humiliation, cupping among others, they all bring pleasure. The real art lies in combining them, resulting in a pleasurable, intense and memorable session.

It feels good though to want to master at least something. After tying Princess on occasions, I finally fell in love with rope bondage. This is the domain in which I want to excel.

Princess knows that when I get hooked on something I’ll go the whole nine yards to master it.

* * * *

Yesterday I received the wooden 9” Shibari ring I had ordered little over a week ago at Esinem’s store.
It took some time to tie the ring to a carabineer in order to get the correct distance from the floor. Sometimes I can lose myself in insignificant details.

Then it was time to pick up Princess at her place and once back home we were excited to use the ring. (I’ll need to tie it again as the ring still hangs to low)

We broke in the ring and it went so natural and so easy. It felt as if I had done rope all my life. I am aware it is not the case. I am still very much a rookie.

Anyway I started with a box-tie and it went well. Tight above the breasts, a little looser under Princess’s breasts. I finished the tie with a Mt Fuji halter neck tie.

I attached a safety rope to the box-tie, at the shoulder, made sure the tie was secured and then up, through the ring, down, up and then securing it with a few half-hitches.

The second rope was used as a single column tie around Princess’s thigh, about 6” above the knee-joint, a safe zone. I pulled the rope up and then Princess was standing on one foot. As I wanted to find out how this felt under more stress I lifted Princess’s other leg.

“Still feels good, Milord, but this finally makes no sense as you are still supporting my weight.”

Fuck it, I thought and grabbed another rope, tied it around Princess’s other ankle, lifted and tied the rope around the ring.

OMG, there she was, my Princess, hanging in our living in a full suspension. She felt very comfortable. No tingling, pain, numbness or whatever.

Oh boy, my very first full suspension just happened like that, in a few easy and well calculated moves. I made a photograph. Sorry for the chaos and ugly background, it is my living room as it is.

Gently I pivoted Princess checking constantly if she was well and nothing was feeling bad or uncomfortable.

While writing this I am still amazed. Princess was happy as a clam; it has been her wish since we started doing rope.

I untied Princess after some 6 or 7 minutes air time. The rest of the evening we spent with intense floor-suspension and some teasing with a cane, a massager and the TENS-unit. The latter was a mistake as it brought Princess out of her Zen-like state.

After that we went to bed and surprisingly we did not feel the need for hard fuckery. Pretty soon I turned the lights off. We enjoyed being together in the darkness. I gently made love to Princess and then we fell asleep.

It had been an intense and fun evening and very memorable.

We, Princess and I, are constantly evolving. Yet the common denominator is rope and it is quite powerful. Using rope, the bondage, is a whole new way of connecting with Princess.

My first full suspension. Not a sexy pose or an amazing photograph.
My first full suspension. Not a sexy pose or an amazing photograph.



Another hot weekend – Saturday

Saturday, December 5, 2015

I pick Princess up at her place. It is 18:30. Princess looks stunning. She always does.
We kiss, I lead her to the car.

“Drinks somewhere first,” I say.
She smiles. Princess likes surprises.

I take her to ‘t Schipke, a restaurant/cafe, in the middle of nowhere, near a river. We have dined there before.

We are given a table in a corner, near the Christmas tree. I order two glasses of white wine.

For a while we chitchat, Princess and I. She has always a lot to tell about her Saturday at home with the kids, with Little Star.
I love listening. Her voice is enthralling. Her stories told with passion and love.

Princess also confirmed that Saturday 16 and Sunday 17 January are okay. All I need is confirmation from Little A’s mom that my youngest won’t be with me or that we can switch weekends. Alas not an easy task.

That weekend Princess and I are driving to a small town in The Netherlands, near the German and Belgian border. We are expected in a 4 Star hotel where we will meet K. and J. for an evening of intense BDSM-play and maybe some sensual, erotic and/or sexy interaction between Princess and J., K’s submissive.

Unfortunately, I cannot tell you more about the hotel because Princess reads my blog too and I do not want to spoil the surprise. But I am sure Princess will be flabbergasted and blown away by the place.

Princess and I are so looking forward to this new experience and Princess is continuously fantasizing about what could or might happen.

I already somewhat decided what I want Princess to wear when we arrive.
I have chosen for a cliché yet a very hot outfit.

High heels of course.
Black silk stockings. I don’t know yet if I’ll go for the black ones of those with a red rim. A matching black suspender belt, black thong and black lace corset.
We we enter the hotel Princess will be hiding all this under a fur coat,  an heirloom and not something that was shot or recently butchered.

I pay, we leave and drive home.

We watch a movie and it is a very interesting one.
A Dangerous Method (2011) gives us a look at how the intense relationship between Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud gives birth to psychoanalysis.
Surprisingly there is some spanking and BDSM in it.

After that we go to bed where I fuck Princess very hard and violently. Princess loves the face slapping, my hand squeezing her throat, my teeth in her shoulders or extreme fierce nipple pinching.

“Please can I cum, Milord?” she moans.
“No, you can’t. If you do I’ll have to punish you.”
“And if I can’t hold it?”

“I’ll have to punish you and believe me, then you’ll be very sorry you were not able to be a good girl,” I growl.

I kiss her knowing I am pushing one of her many buttons and sure enough she comes.

“Thank you, Milord,” she whimpers, a little afraid of what her punishment will be.

She knows it won’t be something noisy like a good spanking as Little A. is staying with us.

I grab some rope and quickly tie Princess’s ankles to the bedposts. When I get the TENS-unit out of the drawer I notice some uneasiness in her eyes.
I smile and leisurely place the Barry Bite body clamps on her outside labia.
“OMG,” Princess whispers.

I connect the device and then turn up power, choose a pulsing program and then bend over Princess and look in her eyes.
“Are you enjoying this?”
“Yes, Milord,” she whispers.
Up goes the power dial.

She moans, closes her eyes. Princess is clearly enjoying her punishment so up goes the power again.

I notice how Princess dances on waves that are neither pure pain or pure pleasure.
Very enjoyable to watch.

I use a ribbed glass dildo as an extra and push her to another orgasm.

After that I untie Princess and hold her in my arms.

I pleasure Princess over and over and then, finally, I turn off the lights.

Found on Tumblr
Found on Tumblr

Biting her Dom

I have a bruise on my left forearm, just under the joint with the upper part of my limb. Not worth a photograph (yet) but I am proud of this mark.
Princess made it.
I guess somewhere between Tuesday late night and Wednesday morning.

Noisy she was, Princess.

Pushed her face against my arm. Desperately trying to muffle her shrieks and moans while on the road to yet another overwhelming release.

“Bite, slut,” I hissed.
Princess sank her teeth in my soft flesh.
Hell, she meant it.
A jolt of deep pain fired through my arm. To my surprise it made me even harder.

Pushed her legs over my shoulders and pushed deeper. And harder.
“More, I want more. Bite harder, slut,” I groaned.
In my mind’s eye I saw how Princess’s teeth broke my skin.

It did not happen though. But it was enough for me to understand I really do like this biting. And the memories that linger for days on my arm.

For some reason Princess held back, she needs some more training to get rid of these last remnants. Whatever they are.

Then Princess came, gushing, moaning and very, very noisy.

Bite mark
Bite mark


Making Princess almost breathless

Tuesday, October 8, 2015

It is warm in our living room and it is a cozy heath, generated by at least 25 candles.

We enjoy a glass of wine, Princess and I. She looks stunning, as always. I cannot take my eyes off her.

For a while we talk. It is how we end the day before switching to absolute Q-time where nothing else matters but us, Princess and I.

*  *  *  *

Princess stands before me. I undress her but let her keep her bra and panties. I put in her wrist cuffs and above each ankle I make a single column tie.

Princess obeys.

I attach the O-ring of each wrist cuff to the rope’s bight with a carabineer.

My god, Princess is so beautiful. Her eyes cast down, she is at my service, waiting for what is to happen.

I could spend a whole evening just looking at Princess while sipping single malt quarter cask whiskey.  Yes, I am talking Laphroaig here.

I show Princess the Pipedream red bondage tape, the scissors and the bandage scissors.

It is not only about showing Princess I am in control, it is about making her believe I am fully prepared when it goes wrong.
That is a part of the make belief.

I blindfold the love of my life. Then start wrapping the Bondage tape around her head. Making sure breathing through her nose is not a viable option.

I push the mouthpiece of my snorkel where it should go and finish taping.

Princess looks like she is wearing a rubber or a latex hood. Her breathing is limited through the snorkel.

Well, I did not go all the way. Princess can still pull some air through her nose. I did not want to go 100% for the first time. I needed to check her reactions.

Princess stayed very calm. Not much did happen. I looked at her and then pinched her nipples and moved my fingers over her panties. It made Princess jump and she reacted to these touches in a way I liked very much.

Snorkel mouth-piece
Snorkel mouth-piece

I closed the opening of the snorkel and counted till 30 or 40 and then moved my fingers over her pussy. I knew she had air, not much, but Princess was not 100% limited to what I decided to give as air supply.

Yet she came much quicker, much more intense, her panties soon dripping wet.

Princess told me her orgasm was very deep but she still felt safe as she was able to get some air.

Next time I’ll be 100% in control. This was just warming up, Princess.

We played for about 30 minutes.

I loved it but was way to busy to monitor Princess’s reactions to get off myself. But getting off is not my goal. I can only enjoy when I know we, Princess and I, are enjoying the same surf.

So next time I’ll be doing this I’ll be 100% in control and get the satisfaction that goes with it. But for my peace of mind I needed to know how Princess coops with this situation.

Then I slowly released her from the deep red bondage tape.

“Care for a spanking?” I asked.

Princess, being a good girl, said “Yes please, Milord.”

I did it the hard way. Topped it off with caning. Counted 20.
Princess came and dropped on her knees, embracing subspace.

I helped her in bed and made sure she was warm and cozy.
Put the toys aside.

Hopped in bed next to Princess. Fucked her.
And again.
Then there was one last one for the road.

I did not come but fuck it. It is not about me. It is all about Princess. I am the puppet master.
I play.
Wished Princess a good night.

When I opened my eyes again it was Friday morning. Princess was still lying next to me.

Happily, my life is not a dream. Princess, my beloved submissive, wife, friend, mistress,  is real and so very tangible.

Princess being somewhat breathless (2015)
Princess being somewhat breathless (2015)

Shibari – Personal Connection: Rope & Pain

This is beautiful rope work. There is this intense interaction between the rigger and the model.

I see this less as a rope session but more as a scene between a sadist and a masochist.
Oh boy, when he bites in her thigh! Simply maddening and I felt a hot shiver of pleasure dance through my body.

Notice the untying, an art in its own right and often forgotten by newbies. Yet very important as it helps the model untie herself mentally from the scene. One should never be awaken in a sudden manner.

Then there is the aftercare, so close, so intimate, which I adore and appreciate.

I hope you’ll enjoy this video as much as I did.

I found this Vimeo video through the blog anniebandfriends.com where I am, a great honor for me, one of the moderators.