Category Archives: Extra playpartners

All posts about our sexual adventures with other people.

Two questions – Second Question

During our discussions about expanding our play ground Princess asked me two important questions.

The first question can be found First Question.

The second question was a little trickier but most of what I said before goes for this question too. Not completely of course and I am still processing that part, trying to find a suitable answer.

Princess wanted to know what I wanted to get out of all this. Not for the first time she wanted to know how I experience the playing as we do it today.

I contemplated, wrote, deleted, rephrased and finally ended up with way too many words and no real answer.

Yesterday I talked about this with Princess and she smiled.
“Keep it simple, Milord. After all that is what you always tell me.”
“So what are you saying, Princess?”
“Think Cat and mice, Milord.”

Thank you Princess, you are a lifesaver.

Imagine this little girl receiving a doll as a gift. She plays with the figurine and puts her in all sorts of situations and/or imagining different scenes. The little girl sees her doll as an extension of her fantasies. She can direct and create and the puppet is a willingly partner in their adventures. Often this is a solitary way of playing. When the little girls come together, they play with their dolls too, but then it is about interacting with other puppets, fantasies become more elaborated. But the little girls remain master of their universe.

I think this comes the closest to describing what I get out of it but on a deeper level. In fact, my puppet, Princess, expresses her desires, her wishes, what might frighten her or make her feel uncomfortable.
I create situations, I create scenarios and then play them with Princess. I get most of my satisfaction, physical and cerebral, doing just that. Creating and playing. Being master of my universe. I play them in real life though. And some of the idea’s I want to develop are like a director writing and the scenario and directing it.

Since we decided to get the extension box I’ll be including a second person in some of my scenario’s, in my stories. Imagine the fun sitting at home and inventing new stuff. Trust me, I am very good at what I do.

There is of course more. The mind play, writing about it, mind fucking Princess so I can even find more devious stuff to do.

Playing with Princess is really a very brainy thing because I am satisfying a bunch of cerebral stuff. I do not get aroused often when playing but my mind is sure as hell doing overtime.

When the scene ends, I enjoy the aftercare and then the intense lovemaking.

Adding a second person to the equation is, for me, opening a world with a zillion possibilities for creating new stories, new scenes.

Yes, it is mostly about playing with a doll, a real human being, Princess. And the power that goes with it. Being somewhat god in my universe. Being a director of my porn flicks. Look at it as my own, very personal Kink.com.

Think of it this way. Princess is open for a woman/woman scene. So, where do I find someone reliable? How do I select and find out if Princess digs this woman? When the final candidate is found, how do I introduce her to Princess?
Hell, all this is already a big part of the fun.

There is a second motivator. I want to explore Princess’s desire, dreams, fantasies. I am giving her carte blanche to do so.  And I love the eye candy that will go with all this.

All this is enveloped by something much more important. Love and trust and respect of course.
It is about guiding Princess, leading Princess and helping her discover her sexuality. Maybe it is more about leading than sexuality.
In my world though both go hand in hand.

Since yesterday I know almost everything is possible. These are hot and grand times.
It is not an exercise on trust but a confirmation.

So finally we come to the essential of BDSM. The submissive has all the power. Without Princess I would be nothing.
Through Princess I shine while she enjoys me pushing her boundaries.

Found on Tumblr
Found on Tumblr

Two Questions – First Question

During our discussion, past Tuesday, about expanding our horizons, Princess asked me two important questions.

The first question was about the woman/woman stuff. Princess wanted to know what my limits where, what I would allow, accept. And what not.

“I have no limits,” I said to her surprise.
“Come again? None at all?”
“No. Besides, it would not be a menacing situation either.”
Princess remained silent for a moment.

“Look, you are curious, you want to explore. I am giving you total freedom on this specific trip. It is not me to decide how far you want to go, that is up to you.”

“Let’s say we get along and I want to go shopping with her.”
“So be it. What would be the problem?”
“Choosing lingerie with her?”
I frown. Did not think of that.
“Well, I’m sure I would enjoy not only your new lingerie but also your stories about trying them on and the fun you both had.”

“We would play afterwards, somewhere in a hotel room.”

“That I would not appreciate. It would be far beyond the scope we have set. You are curious, I lead you, help you and watch over you, make you feel safe. So that part we do together.”

“Maybe you want to touch her…”
Princess is testing me. It is okay for her to do so. I am offering something special, she wants to know if there is a catch.

“I would love the eye candy. Steering you, leading, creating play scenario’s and enjoying them as a director. Preparing these kind of scenes is a lot of work. It is something I love doing. Thinking about how I am going to push you, help you expand you limits, finding new ways of surprising you, helping you discover yourself even more.”

Princess is not completely convinced yet.
“Trust me, Princess, I crave your body, your scent, your taste, the texture of your skin, being at home in your arms. There is no other woman who can offer me that. And in the end, stripped down, a body is just a body.
Yours satisfies me completely. I have no desire whatsoever to touch or use an other body.”

She smiles and knows I am telling the truth.
Princess is the only one. I tell it with every kiss, with every touch, with every fuck.

“I would hate it though waking up one morning, finding a note telling me you left me for J. and are going to live on the Greek Isle of Lesbos with her. Leaving me with K. Hell, he is not my type.”

Princess laughs, I laugh. We are good again.

It is up to Princess. I really have no issues with her experimenting woman/woman with me as her guide and guard.

The second question was a little trickier but most of what I said before goes for this question too. Not completely of course and I am still processing that part, trying to find a suitable answer.

Princess wanted to know what I wanted to get out of all this. Not for the first time she wanted to know how I experience the playing as we do it today.

I hope to write my thoughts very soon, for myself, but also for the blog.

Rope work by Wykd Dave. http://rope-topia.com Reproduced with kind permission of Wykd Dave

Rope work by Wykd Dave.
http://rope-topia.com
Reproduced with kind permission of Wykd Dave

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New horizons

With K & J we rented the Dungeon a couple of times for private play. No mixing, just playing.

Princess told me afterwards she found it a shame we did not interact with each other, submissive play between our women, assignments for example, given by us, their Dom’s.

We were one of their witnesses when K & J held their Rose Ceremony.

A few days ago we got a mail from K & J. K. wrote they had been experimenting a little and his wife, J., had enjoyed playing with another submissive a lot. They wanted to deepen this experience and, based on a few posts I did, asked if we were open to explore this woman/woman play with them.
It is about touching a breast, a nipple, a kiss maybe.

They trust and respect us completely and vice versa and K. and I are much alike when it comes to fantasies and how we play with our women. Traveling along this road with people they/we know, appreciate and trust, would be more pleasurable and safe.

Past Tuesday, during dinner, Princess and I talked, discussing our hard and soft limits.

My trust in Princess is absolute. My love for Princess is unconditional. My respect for Princess also absolute.

After 4 years I am quite sure what she likes, desires, fantasizes about. Our communication is completely open. We have no secrets.

We discussed our limits before our very first visit to The Dungeon. We discussed them about a year later preceding our first private play-date with K& J and another couple.
A few days ago we discussed them again.

It is a shame I did not write them down when we talked about our limits the first time. I am sure we would smile reading them today.

We are on an amazing journey, Princess and I.
Our limits are now defined in a different way. It is not about what we can and can’t do anymore. It is about respect and trust, knowing nothing is forced, no pressure. Spontaneity. Excitement. Eye candy.

Let us be clear though. It is not about sharing Princess with others (men) if you think of sharing as in full-blown sex in group or a threesome or whatever. It is not about sex just for the sake of it.

Princess is not bisexual but just a little curious. I have no problem with Princess exploring this during play scenes without forcing a situation. I want to guide her, help her explore that part of her sexuality but respect her boundaries when or if they occur.

I am not saying we are actively searching but we are open for it if it suits Princess/us and it has an added value to the play situation and not just sex for the act itself.

I will be meeting K. in the next few day. Will discuss and probably come up with some hot scenario’s.

When I have finished doing some self-assessment I’ll do a post on how I experience playing with Princess and, more important, what I get out of it.

Found on Tumblr. No credits found.
Found on Tumblr. No credits found.

 

 

 

 

 

 

To Share or Not to Share – Revisited – 2

Long before I met Princess I dabbled a while with the swinger’s world. I was an extra, not a player. I learned a few things though.

Long before Princess met me she dabbled in the same world, the swinger world. It was not entirely a free choice but more about saving a marriage. Yet a few meetings pleasure her.

Princess told me about these meetings and I listened. Did not question. I just listened. Talking is often about listening.

In this swinger’s world I was invited and with me 4 other guys. Finally, it was me, a guy and the husband. The host told me men often kick on the idea but do not show up. For whatever reason (small dick, thin dick, other issues).

So there I was and watched a good-looking woman being fucked by her husband and an invitee.
I myself had been unlucky and most of my ex-girlfriends had an issue with sucking dick. I did not fuck this woman, I enjoyed the BJ’s she gave me way too much.

And I loved watching this middle-aged good-looking woman being fucked by two men.
Eye candy, you know.

I ejaculated spontaneously while getting rid of my undies and watching the guy sinking his cock in her.

Then hubby took a seat and watched his wife being used by two men. Safe of course, both mouth and cunt.

Hell, at that time I would have given a testicule for a girlfriend like that.
It never happened though.
I am happy it didn’t yet I do not think bad of swingers.
Yet I learned a few things.

I am a voyeur.
I thought I was an exhibitionist and I still think I am. I would not hesitate to fuck Princess while people watch us. But I know I would forget the audience because I would be concentrated on fucking Princess.

Would I let a blindfolded Princess be touched by a stranger in a controlled environment? Would he be allowed to finger her? Make her orgasm, but Princess would thank me, as the guy would be but a tool and I the Puppet Master?
I knew the answer was Yes. I hid that for Princess till this morning.

I never told Princess about my deepest fantasies, except for the women/women kind of stuff. You share ideas, dreams, but some of them stay unspoken because you are afraid your partner could misinterpret them.

Then there was this mail K & J send us. It made the discussions we had with one of the Fetish Cafe’s members, finally all hard limits fade, a reality.

tumblr_lqygostw7t1qbitbyo1_1280

To Share or Not to Share – Revisited

These past days have been for us, Princess and I, literally groundbreaking.

It started with a mail, referring to a post I did in August 2015, called To Share or Not To Share. This post was based on one I wrote two months earlier, Back to the Dungeon.

Of course it was not only the mail but it sure as whatever accelerated the process that was going on. An evolution so to speak, most of the time buried in a few spoken fantasies during rough sex.

I really have no clue how to begin this post so I’ll start with a timeline highlighting the most important moments in the BDSM part of our life.

September 6, 2011 – Parent’s evening at Little A’s school. I meet (for a second time I found out later) Princess. I start a conversation with her, my very first time I approached a woman in that way, and leave later on with Princess’s phone number written on a piece of paper.

September 20, 2011 – Our very first date.

October 9, 2011 – We make love for the first time. Much to her surprise she comes during oral sex. For me making love with Princess was the best I ever had.

January 2, 2012 – The past 3 months have been turbulent. Princess wasn’t sure she was ready for a relationship. January 2 marks as second start.

Gradually the lovemaking becomes rougher and I’m secretly hoping Princess is not only into BDSM too but also compatible.

August 15, 2012 – Princess finally comes out of the closet. Read the memories of that evening in August 15th 2013.

November 16th, 2012 – The blog Princess and I, Bound by Desire, is born. The first article is Nipples & Clothespins.

August, 2, 2013 – It is a Friday evening. We are nervous because we are taking BDSM outdoors. We are going to check out the Fetish Cafe in Antwerp. The Cafe is open for 18+, we attend a Shibari show and someone of the FC’s Staff takes care of us, answering all our questions.

September 7, 2013 – We attend our very first Fetish Lounge Club for couples at the Fetish Cafe in Antwerp. I wish I had written our limits down, I wish we could look back and see how we were then, so nervous, not really knowing what to expect. It was a grand evening.

October 5, 2013 – We meet K & J at the Fetish Cafe. They contacted us through Fetlife.

December 6, 2013 – We, Princess and I, attend a 6-hour workshop on Shibari.

May 24, 2014 – If I am not mistaken our first private play with two other couples. One of them K & J. We talked and talked, Princess and I, letting go of some soft limits, anticipating on what would happen.

It was great but it did not meet our expectations. There was no real interaction.

May 31, 2015 – We are invited to K & J’s Rose Ceremony

We don’t attend the Couple’s Fetish Lounge Evenings that much anymore. We prefer a mixed public, couples and single males.

July 19, 2015 – Back to the Dungeon – Part 2

Then things become different. We are no into the Fetish Lounge things anymore. Boring. Couples come and play and then, in the bar, are unapproachable isles. We need more and we start to make plans to visit other places. Fortunately, there are new initiatives emerging and a well know swingers’ club closed and opened as a BDSM club.

6 November 2015 – We receive a mail from K & J. I read it to Princess, through the phone. My message is simple. Listen, ask questions regarding the content of the mail and then think about it.

November 9, 2015 – Princess and I discuss the mail by phone. Talking is easier, there is no distraction, no touching, just listening.

November 10, 2015 – In the evening I pick up Princess. We go out for dinner. A classy Chinese Restaurant. We talk, fantasize, talk and discuss our limits. Not only our limits but so many other issues. We have our past experiences, we know what we want, desire and dream. For Princess and I sexuality and lovemaking is very important because it is whom we are.

Yet I am not completely honest because there is something I am not saying because, well, we both have our past.

November 11, 2015 – We fuck like hungry dogs. Like we always do. Yet something has changed. There is the notion of lovemaking, there is the sex too. They offer a zillion titillating scenarios when combined.

We talked, Princess and I, these past few days. We went deep, we even involved past experiences, other lives, other times, in our discussion. They are a part of whom we are today and define somehow our relation.

I came clear with Princess and I talked about my deepest fantasies. Then she did too. We listened to each other, that is what communication is about. Listening.

There is no such thing as hard limits. No for us that is.

To be continued.

Source http://cassandredayne.wordpress.com/2015/02/17/the-scent-of-his-belt/
Source http://cassandredayne.wordpress.com/2015/02/17/the-scent-of-his-belt/