I’m sure there are still a few writing errors in this book and I hope everything is well formatted. I checked the links to YouTube and other blogs and updated or removed them when the content was no longer available.
Our story began on September 20, 2011 and less than a year later, on August 15, Princess revealed she was into submission and BDSM.
On November 16, 2012 I started the WordPress blog Princess and I, Bound by Desire.
From the start it was intended as a personal diary. It would be about our erotica and BDSM and some personal stuff when it was relevant enough or if it had an impact on our relation.
In the beginning I added some topics about my photography but eventually that faded away when I started my photography blog under my real name.
Over time I gathered a handful loyal readers. Some of them became great online friends too. I am very grateful for that.
I have never been into stats and hits and followers.
I moved to a self-hosted site on August 15, 2013.
My very first post was titled Nipples and Clothespins. We had actually never tried it and after reading Princess told me she was not sure she could stand the pain.
I showed Princess this image.
“Oh no”, she gasped, “this must really hurt. My nipples are so sensitive. Never ever do this to me. Please.”
“I can’t promise”, I told her.
I love browsing through our diary. So many unforgettable and intense memories.
Things have really changed over these past 4 years.
It is obvious you get what you payed for.
At first I was rather ignorant in where to find toys so I opted for a huge well-known international adult life-style shopping site.
I don’t have any of these toys anymore. Some even broke down after being used a few times. The faux-leather cuffs did not even withhold Princesses’ leg shaking after an intense orgasm. After being use 4 times the soft silicone glans of the Rabbit vibrator showed fissures.
What I have left from those first acquisitions is a beaten down, no pun intended, flogger. It was our very first one and I’m keeping it as a souvenir.
Luckily Princesses’ and my desires, wishes and grow paths in BDSM are fully compatible.
Here too we have evolved considerably. From the beginning I chose to move very gradually so after all these years there is still so much growth in our BDSM experience.
Although we both love the D/s part, Bondage, mostly rope, and SM are the flavors we prefer.
Recently I added a whip to my collection and Princess loves its sting, so different from a flogger, leather or suede, or a cane or riding crop.
Because we trust each other completely, because we have a very open communication, because it feels like a natural step, we are, slowly, including extra play partners. That to is an exciting voyage.
Our love has intensified; I have never been so close with somebody as with Princess. Princess is my wife to be, my lover, my slut, my best friend, my soul-mate, my submissive.
I trust Princess with my life.
It is beautiful and amazing poetry that moved me deeply and it comes very close to how I feel about my relation with Princess and our journey.
In this poem I read what Princess has given already and is still giving me.
MrModigliani’s words touched me by their familiarity.
Princesses’ gift of Love, surrender and submission is one of a priceless value.
It is something I have never experienced before.
Step deeper into yourself and sense her. What do you feel? She invited you down the path of her own faith and gave you one key. Are you really worth it? Can she really let you inside the golden temple of her trust?
You are brash. But you really have no idea what is before you. There is a door that she wants you to pass through. And yet what you don’t yet grasp is that there are seven door to seven temples, each temple being inside another. Each temple has its own door requiring a new key. And only she will decide if you are allowed to pass.
There is little likelihood that you will ever pass through these seven doors or even get inside the second temple. But, if you do, you will reach her inner sanctum and achieve the greatest divinity of knowing her. And she will give you everything in multiples of whatever you have experienced.
Enjoy the rest of MrModigliani’s poem HERE. It will leave you breathless with its sheer beauty.
So many mornings waking up next to Princess lay behind me already. I pray each and every day that I still have a zillion more mornings like these.
Feeling Princesses’ warmth, touching her soft skin. Her blonde hair exploding in golden fire, lit by an early morning sun.
Looking at Princess in awe, while she sleeps, or looks back at me, drowsy and smiling. Whispering a good morning just before our lips meet so our tongues can dance.
The kisses and the promises of intense lovemaking or a good and rough fuck.
I have written about these moments but only a few days ago I read a short story by Rachel de Vine and it touched me because it says almost exactly what I feel and think on these lazy mornings. She says it so much better than I ever could.
Rachel writes very fine erotica and I am a huge fan. Please visit her blog/personal web space by clicking HERE.
To the Stars and Back – Erotic fiction
by Rachel de Vine
He looked down at the woman sleeping beside him. Knees drawn up, arms tucked around her body, she lay almost in a foetal position, as though trying to protect herself from something. She must be dreaming, he thought, as she whimpered lightly in her sleep. Perhaps she was recalling the events of the previous evening. But were the whimpers from the echo of the pleasure or the pain? He smiled, reliving the memory of her moans and the way she had arched her back and begged him for more as he had tormented her with his tongue. For a few seconds the fleeting memories renewed the pleasure in his groin, before his thoughts once more returned to the present and to the woman at his side.
She’s so beautiful; she almost takes my breath away.
She had thrown off the sheet, the only bedcovering on this hot, steamy night, her naked body reflecting the light from the moon, hanging full and ripe in the night sky. Her body was slight, but curved in all the right places, with breasts that were just the right size for him to take one completely in each hand, squeezing in the way that he tested the ripeness of the fruit he bought at the market. Full of desire, he let his eyes slide over her velvet-smooth skin, unblemished except for the faint markings he had left on her breasts and wrists; markings like a signature that reminded him that he was hers.
He could take her now in her sleep, awakening her with his stiff cock that was already twitching at the thought, but decided to wait. Let her sleep a little longer. They had played hard the night before and he knew that he had exhausted her with his unquenchable need for her body. He must try and pace himself, he thought wryly, even as he knew that there was something about her expressive eyes, her slow, gentle smile and her alluring body that made it almost impossible to resist the primitive urge that welled up from deep within him. That urge made him want to take her, to possess her, to tease her, to control her, to show her the beauty in the pain that he inflicted and the joy and pleasure that followed as they reached the top of the mountain together, leaping off to soar into that place in the universe where great stars collide and explode.
This is an excerpt but you can read the whole article HERE.
Takeaway:Real dominants don’t all wear three-piece suits or leather. They don’t throw out orders to total strangers. But they have many traits in common – and none of them are sexual or about the clothes they wear.
Contrary to what the erotica burning up e-readers around the world will tell you, not all Dominants wear three-piece suits, own multi-billion dollar corporations, or turn their secretaries into their submissives from the first interview. Books like that are fun to read and certainly get me all steamed up, but trying to find a Dominant that fits that mold is nearly impossible.
Dominant people, because they can be male or female, cis or trans, come in every shape, size, color, sexual preference, income bracket, education level and career. There is no perfect picture of a Dominant. The men don’t all wear suits. The women don’t always wear leather or latex. Many Dominants I know are typically found in jeans and t-shirts.
So, what does a “real” Dominant look like? In my experience – as someone who loves a Dominant and is friends with others – they all have very similar traits. But here’s the surprising thing: Not one of those traits is physical.
Common Traits of a Real Dominants
A good Dominant doesn’t rush into giving you commands from the moment you meet. If they do, it’s likely a test. Master M, a friend of mine and Domme (yes, she’s female and yes, she uses the title “Master”), has said many times that if she’s giving a new potential submissive an order, it’s to see if they have a backbone and will stand up to her. Dominants are in no rush to have you bow and kneel before them. They want to get to know you as a person first. (Learn more in 5 Ways to Spot a Good Dominant.)
The best Dominants do what they say they’re going to do. They’re consistent in thought, speech and action. You know where you stand with them. The reality is that you might not always like what you hear, but you know you’re being told the truth as they see it or they’re doing what they think is best.
The new edition of the Rope Bottom guide is now available to download.
This guide is provided free of charge and is free to reproduce for educational purposes.
This is the 4th edition of the Rope Bottom Guide and has been completely re-written to be even more concise and readable. It is illustrated with all new bondage images shot especially for this new edition.
Please share this resource with bottoms, models, riggers and anyone who might be able to make use of this information.
The new edition is only available in English at the moment but translations in Italian, Spanish, Dutch, Romanian, French, Polish & German will be made available as soon as possible.
I feel this subject is often overlooked. Here is an excellent article on how a submissive experiences a breakup. I found this on The Ochre Muse, a blog I highly recommend visiting.
As submissives, we arrive in relationships as blank slates, ready to be drawn all over in whichever shades and shapes our dominants choose. We grow (or cut) our hair for them. We change the way we dress. We change where we dress and how we go out. We have (or don’t have) X number of orgasms when they’re not around. We wear (or don’t wear) the red French knickers and ben wah balls on Mondays between two and four. Our vanilla time without our dominants is often filled with protocols. Our entire lives become all about them.
Essentially, subs do what vanillas are advised against: never change for your lover. Never let them change the way you live your life or what you wear because when they’re gone it will feel as though the earth has been pulled out from under you. Try getting that right as a sub. It just ain’t happening.
While browsing the site I found an article titled “The Puzzle of Sadomasochism”. The theory the author describes sounds very familiar and thus goes also largely for me.
Here it goes..
The Puzzle of Sadomasochism
D/s has a way of sneaking up on me and saying, “Here’s the most innocuous bit of power exchange I could come up with, but you’re gonna love it anyway.” Take the fact that SS makes me get naked and wait in position upstairs for him while he drinks a cup of coffee and reads his emails. Any ordinary person would consider that rude. Me? The longer he takes, the hotter it is. Then there’s pain. What, precisely, is so sexy about it? Why is the fact that he likes to hurt me such a turn on? What is it about impact play that’s so intensely sexual?
If you come up with a legitimate explanation, I’ll pay you a jar of Nutella per word for it.
It’s impossible for me to intellectualise about BDSM without seeing the absurdity in the stuff I take pleasure out of, but I’m definitely having more fun than those people on Facebook. Vanillas have about 20 different ways to vary their in-the-dark sex. Us? We probably have 50 000. Cleaning up after play is like tidying after a toddler: toys, toys every-damned-where.
Once again I cannot agree more with these wise words written by my friend Vile. You can read more on his excellent blog The Kinky World Of Vile.
Dominants Have Rules And Protocols As Well
Many of the blogs here on wordpress when speaking about Domination and submission are geared towards relationships, the Submissive, the Dominant, the Master, the Slave.
The slave or submissive tells about their life and journeys , The Doms and Masters talk about their lives , their relationships, rules , structure, and some protocols.
We Masters , Dominants and Daddy Doms just as the submissive , Baby Girl, or slave are a direct reflection of our property. We set standards in place for our property to follow, we set rules for private and public, but we have to he held accountable as well, after all our property looks up to us as leaders.
We train ours how to act, how to speak, talk and walk, we impose rules some stricter than others, we control , we guide and we have expectations, and if not followed punishment is in the air.
On a couple of occasions we left a lifestyle function and Arianna said Master there were somethings you said that did not make you look good, or maybe you should of worded that statement different. After thinking about her comment I found it to be true. Okay my bad , I have a habit of saying what is on my mind , but here is the thing if Arianna noticed it so did everyone else, no one ever says anything so if she did not bring it up I would of never thought about it.
Content Credit – I found this on Fetlife, a post by SrMichael under the title “Definition of a Dom as seen by Gentleman Doms”. Much of the content is a partial repost of a blog from “The Eroticists” of a repost of a My Secret Thoughts exchange he happened to come across. Some rewording has been done to accommodate.
I more than second this post as it expresses perfectly my point of view. So without further ado.
A Dom does not demand respect. He conducts himself in such a way as to be worthy of respect.
A Dom does not bark commands. His presence is such that he can seduce and command with nothing more than a glance.
A Dom does not raise his voice. He is the kind of man who gets what he wants without needing to.
A Dom is not a braggart. He is possessed of a calm, quiet confidence that is evident in his demeanor, the way he walks, the tone of his voice, and all other aspects of him.
A Dom understands balance. He knows that while a firm hand and discipline are critical in this type of relationship, knowing when to be gentle and understanding is every bit as important.
A Dom is a gentleman first and foremost. That does not necessarily mean that he is a fancy man who values the finer things in life, but he does understand manners and protocol. He opens the car door for her. He orders for her if she is having trouble deciding. He treats strangers with courtesy and respect.
A Dom is a protector. He makes sure that his submissive feels safe and protected at all times. This means so much more than just telling her you will protect her. A Dom shows her. He keeps a hand on her shoulder or on her waist in crowds so she does not get nervous. He sleeps on the side of the bed closest to the door so that he is always between his submissive and an intruder. He walks on the side of the sidewalk closest to the street so that an errant vehicle will hit him before his submissive. If anything or anyone should threaten his submissive, he is prepared to fight for her with the ferocity of an alpha wolf.
A Dom earns her submission. It is not a thing to be demanded, expected, or assumed. And he continues to earn it, day after day.
A Dom values her submission. Fully submitting your will and trusting your body and well-being to someone takes a kind of strength most cannot imagine, and a Dom never loses sight of that.
A Dom understands that being a dominant is 10% privilege and 90% responsibility. He is literally taking her life into his hands. He is accepting the most sacred and important thing she has to give. He is taking her burdens and bearing them as his own, always, every day.
A Dom is consistent. He understands that he cannot just be her protector, lover, confidant, master, etc. when he feels like it. There will be days when a Dom is tired. There will be days when he is stressed. There will be days when he is broken. On those days, it is more important than ever for a Dom to earn her submission. It is not a thing to be demanded, expected, or assumed. And he continues to earn it, day after day.
So what does it mean, then, to be a Dom? Some might say that it is all about making her kneel, having your way with her, shouting orders and using her. Helpful hint: Any jackass can buy himself a whip and bark commands. That is not a Dom. Make no mistake, a Dom does absolutely have his way with his submissive. He loves it when she kneels. He loves and thrives on the kinky, rough, mind-blowing sex they have. A Dom loves to dominate his submissive in the bedroom and elsewhere. But for every moment of that, there are a hundred moments of holding her, of talking to her, laughing with her, living life with her. There are a hundred moments of making her feel safe when she is afraid, giving her confidence when she is unsure, comforting her when she feels troubled, encouraging her in pursuits outside of her service to him. Those are all things that a Dominant does too.
These things do not make a Dom weak. They do not make a Dom less of a Dominant. There is nothing quite as formidable as a Dominant who has found the perfect submissive to fuel his fire. Never will you see anyone love so strongly or fight so fiercely as a Dom to show his submissive that he is still everything she needs him to be.
I am reblogging this lovely, tender and moving post written by Southern Sir.
For us, Princess and I, the gesture of her kneeling for me, is an intense moment and fills me with an avalanche of love. At moments like this we feel bound by a tremendous amount of warmth and intense love.
It is thus easily understandable that I can relate to this post written by Southern Sir.
So without further due…
Kayla is a babygirl , I know shocking isn’t it. She has many attributes of a babygirl, she squeals when she is happy, she’s been known to stamp her foot a time or two in disapproval, and she can pout right up there with the best of them. Someone wrote a post recently about pouting and I’m sorry I can’t remember who, but as I read it the thought that came to mind is; they could be sisters.
Now as a babygirl Kayla has certain rules and rituals she must follow, she just doesn’t run wild and her being the good girl she is she does her utmost best to follow the rules laid out for her.
Of the rules she has there is two times during the day when she must kneel for me. Kneeling is at least to me a very submissive posture, it shows that they are both humble and vulnerable. By kneeling it also buts a submissive in a position where they can be easily over-powered by the fact that when they are on the ground in that position they leave themselves defenseless. Each time Kayla kneels for me I have different feelings.
In the evenings after the boys have gone to bed, Kayla makes dessert and a cup of coffee for me. When she brings me my coffee she kneels before me and offers the cup to me. When she does this I am usually sitting in my chair in the living room. The angle it puts me in is that she is about eye level to me when she hands me my coffee.